By Myslf

Background

Josh Abraham Remix

The remix was created by Josh Abraham, who produced and performed on Orgy's first two albums. Guitars were recorded by Stephen Carpenter of Deftones, with whom Linkin Park had toured in 2001. Stephen later became the godfather of Chester's son Draven. Bass was provided by Phoenix. Ryan Williams and Jonas G. also worked on the remix as engineers at Pulse Recordings. Additional programming was handled by Erik Gregory from industrial metal band Society 1.

Marilyn Manson Remix

On a January 11, 2002 linkinpark.com chat, Mike Shinoda confirmed Marilyn Manson would be working on a remix for Linkin Park: "manson told us he'd do a track, but he hasn't had time to yet. we don't know him very well, so we don't really feel that we're in a position to bug him. (at least not me)" A fan who went by the nickname "oblivion" offered to contact him and ask about the remix, but Mike said, "oblivion: thanks you, but i don't want to pester him. if he wants to do it, please let him know we are eagerly awaiting word that he is working on it. if not, we will have other options"

On March 3, 2002, Marilyn Manson made a post on his official message boards about working on new music. About the remix, he wrote, "I have not yet remixed Linkin Park but I have been asked to do so. It is possible I might make one of their songs something that people who dislike them could appreciate. I enjoy challenges and the opportunity to create. Money doesn't make a difference as long as I enjoy doing something."

Although the remix didn't make the final tracklist, on July 3, 2002, Brad Delson revealed that a version of "By Myself" by the band Marilyn Manson would "appear as a B-side on some upcoming release."

The remix was created by Marilyn Manson (vocalist), with guitars recorded by John 5 and keyboards by Marilyn Manson and Madonna Wayne Gacy. Tim Sköld served as co-producer, engineer, mixer, programmer on the remix.

This remix, titled "Buy Myself", was included on the "Pts.Of.Athrty" single and on the Japanese and iTunes versions of Reanimation. Mike commented on the title, "For the record, I knew he was kinda making fun of us with that title, it's very "Manson" to do that. But I liked the idea of embracing that and going with the title anyway."

Music Video

The music video for "By_Myslf" was directed by Matt Bass for MTV2's "MTV:Playback".

MTV: Playback was originally aired on July 27, 2002 at 2:00pm, with a rerun on July 28, 2002 at 8:00pm.

Versions

Note: Only the date of the very first release of each version is listed.

Josh Abraham Remix

Title	Album	Length	Recorded	Released	Notes
By_Myslf	Reanimation	3:42	2001	July 30, 2002	Remix by Josh Abraham and Mike Shinoda. Features guitars by Stephen Carpenter. The ending of this version continues in the beginning of "Kyur4 Th Ich".
By_Myslf	Songs From Reanimation	3:44	2001	2002	Longer ending (very low). This version replaced the album version in the initial iTunes release of Reanimation. This was fixed in subsequent releases.
By_Myslf	Reanimation - Instrumentals	3:42	2001		Official instrumental version.

Marilyn Manson Remix

Title	Album	Length	Recorded	Released	Notes
Buy Myself Remix	Pts.Of.Athrty Reanimation Compilation Hybrid Theory (20th Anniversary Edition)	4:27	2002	July 19, 2002	Remix by Marilyn Manson and Tim Sköld served as co-producer, engineer, mixer, programmer on the remix. Features guitars by John 5, keyboards by Marilyn Manson and Madonna Wayne Gacy, and programming by Tim Sköld.

Live

"By_Myslf" has never been performed live in any form.

"Buy Myself" has never been performed in its entirety live. However, part of the song was sampled in Joe's solo on The Hunting Party touring cycle.

Personnel

By_Myslf

• Josh Abraham - interpretation
• Stephen Carpenter - guitar
• Ryan Williams - engineer
• Jonas G. - engineer
• Erik Gregory - programming
• Phoenix - bass

Buy Myself

• Marilyn Manson - interpretation, keyboards
• John 5 - guitar
• Madonna Wayne Gacy - keyboards
• Tim Sköld - co-producer, engineer, mixing, programming

Production (Album)

• Mike Shinoda - producer
• Mark "Spike" Stent - mixing
• David Treahearn - mixing assistant
• Paul "P-Dub" Walton - ProTools enginer
• Brian "Big Bass" Gardner - mastering, digital editing
• Nancie Stern - sample clearance

Lyrics

Myself…
Myself…

What do I do to ignore them behind me
Do I follow my instincts blindly
Do I hide my pride from these bad dreams
And give in to sad thoughts that are maddening
Do I sit here and try to stand it
Or do I try to catch them red-handed
Do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness
Or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness
Because I can't hold on when I'm stretched so thin
I make the right moves but I'm lost within
I put on my daily facade but then
I just end up getting hurt again

By myself (myself)
I ask why
But in my mind I find
I can't rely on myself (myself)
I ask why
But in my mind I find
I can't rely on myself

I can't look around
(It's too much to take in)
I can't hold on
(When I'm stretched so thin)
I can't slow down
(Watching everything spin)
I can't look back
(It's starting over again)

If I turn my back I'm defenseless
And to go blindly seems senseless
If I hide my pride and let it all go on
Then they'll take from me 'till everything is gone
If I let them go I'll be outdone
But if I try to catch them I'll be outrun
If I'm killed by the questions like a cancer
Then I'll be buried in the silence of the answer

By myself (myself)
I ask why
But in my mind I find
I can't rely on myself (myself)
I ask why
But in my mind I find
I can't rely on myself

I can't look around
(It's too much to take in)
I can't hold on
(When I'm stretched so thin)
I can't slow down
(Watching everything spin)
I can't look back
(It's starting over again)

(Don't you) (x37)
Don't you (know)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside

Don't you (know)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside

Don't you (know)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside

Don't you (know)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside

Don't you (know)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside

Don't you (know)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside

What do I do to ignore them behind me
Do I follow my instincts blindly
Do I hide my pride away from these bad dreams
And give in to sad thoughts that are maddening
Do I sit here and try to stand it
Or do I try to catch them red-handed
To I trust some and get fooled by loneliness
Or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness
Because I can't hold on when I'm stretched so thin
I make the right moves but I'm lost within
I put on my daily facade but then
I just end up getting hurt again

By myself
(Myself)
I ask why
(Myself)
I can't rely on myself
(Myself)
I ask why
(But in my mind I find)
I can't rely on myself

I can't hold on
(To what I want when I'm stretched so thin)
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
(To anything, watching everything spin)
With thoughts of failure sinking in

If I turn my back, I'm senseless
And to go blindly seem defenseless
If I hide my pride and let it all go on
Then they'll take from me till everything is gone
If I let them go, I'll be outrun
But if I try to catch them, I'll be outdone
If I'm killed by the questions like a cancer
Then I'll be buried in the silence of the answer

By myself
(Myself)
I ask why
(Myself)
I can't rely on myself
(Myself)
I ask why
(But in my mind I find)
I can't rely on myself
(In my mind I find)

I can't hold on
(To what I want when I'm stretched so thin)
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
(To anything, watching everything spin)
With thoughts of failure sinking in

How do you think
I've lost so much
I'm so afraid
I'm out of touch
How do you expect
I will know what to do
When all I know
Is what you tell me to

Don't you (know)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside

Don't you (know)
I can't tell you how to make it (go)
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)
I can't seem to convince myself (why)
I'm stuck on the outside

I can't hold on
(To what I want when I'm stretched so thin)
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
(To anything, watching everything spin)
With thoughts of failure sinking in

I can't hold on
(To what I want when I'm stretched so thin)
It's all too much to take in
I can't hold on
(To anything, watching everything spin)
With thoughts of failure sinking

Gallery

• 

  DVD artwork

• 

  Linkin Park, Taproot and Deftones in March 2001

• 

  Chester and his son, Draven Bennington, with his godfather, Stephen Carpenter of Deftones in 2003